I’m back in Scotland now and although it’s good to be home (especially as I am still ill!) I am missing the rock and the people we met during our trip! 5 weeks was a long time to spend in one place, and the combination of camping in a tent during cold nights and doing the epic hour-long walk-in roughly 25 times up and down certainly took its toll on us! Our last week was frustrating in that Robbie’s finger was split open on his 8b project and I fell ill with suspected food poisoning through handling raw chicken - resulting in little to no climbing in the last week
However, the trip as a whole was both enjoyable and successful - we are definitely heading back next year! It was great to hang out with our friends from the GB Climbing Team in a non-competitive environment for a change, and just relax and enjoy the climbing.
We also met loads of new and interesting people from all around the world, as well as learning about ourselves as climbers and what we need to work on for next year. In fact, Robbie and me were so psyched about our goals for next year that we listed them in a document at Lyon aiport and made a training programme in order to acheive them!
My main concern before I arrived was my finger injuries - I had two minor pulley tears (one on each ring finger) which had been holding me back both in training and performance. I had been climbing on them carefully and not following much structured training other than pure bouldering sessions. I saw gains in strength and power compared to last year, as I had never really just trained bouldering on its own before in 11 years of climbing, but still had to err on the side of caution and stop when it hurt too much - a necessary evil! :p Coping with an injury is frustrating and has an affect on the mind which can be almost as distressing as (if not more) than the physical pain in some cases. I had never really had a serious injury through climbing in 10 years before this (apart from two hernias, not necessarily due to climbing!) and always tried my best to avoid getting injured, so when the first one arrived after Ceuse last year, it was hard for me to accept. Just as this one was starting to heal up in February this year, the same injury occurred on my right hand - even more acute than the first one. I had just competed in the BBC’s and was feeling confident in my bouldering, I knew I had improved a lot and was reluctant to take it easy - I wanted to go to Spain and climb hard routes, this was the last thing I needed! In the end I had to ease off the gas and listen to my body (and Robbie!) I focussed on slopey holds and big dynamic moves between jugs, avoiding crimps and pinches or any move/hold which could hurt. I had a great trip in Spain, it was a real learning curve as I had to step back a fair bit and do lots of mileage to build confidence and movement skills on the rock. I found it harder to predict which holds and moves would be painful on the rock, and lacked aggression to really go for moves in fear of causing potentially permanent damage to my fingers. I ended up ticking my first 8a by working my way through the grades and picking an apprropriate route. I learned ways of climbing without over-straining my fingers on rock and overcame a massive hurdle in doing the 8a. I hoped I could learn from this experience and give it my best in Ceuse…
The first few days were all about mileage (and getting used to the walk-in!) - my fingers were slightly tweaky but felt different after two or three days of climbing. I have no idea how or why my fingers healed so suddenly, but I reckon a combination of hot weather, Tiger Balm and the magical rock of Ceuse had something to do with it! It is slightly creepy that my first injury appeared the day after I got home from Ceuse last year, and upon my return both disappear! Despite the lack of pain, I was sceptical and still wary of pushing myself too hard too soon. I also felt relatively unfit on the rock, which was frustrating! 8 months of no route-climbing meant I was getting pumped quick, something I hadn’t experienced since returning to climbing after my operation last February (and that was only 10 weeks off!) As a result I lacked confidence - I was strong enough to do moves but felt pumped and unnerved by big run-outs on vertical/slabby ground (for which Ceuse is notorious!) I found it hard to get psyched when all I was worrying about was falling and hurting myself - it really detracted from the climbing and irritated me. Being on a rope again high up felt really unnatural after bouldering for so long, and I seemed to have acquired some kind of injury paranoia after dealing with two of them for a year. It took about 2 weeks to be fully comfortable with falling, I overcame it by warming up on tricky 7a/+ slabs and realising that the determination I had to do the route was more than the chance I had of hurting myself by falling.
I ticked ”Petit Tom” 8a, but it had been a case of getting redpoint stress and having a lack of confidence, which made it take a lot longer to do than it should have. I was also still building up my endurance and quite often I would just pump out and fall off! The major turning point of the trip was the day that I almost did “Carte Blanche” 8a second go. I don’t really know what came over me, or at what point I changed my outlook on redpointing, but I just remember feeling really angry with myself for not going for moves previously on routes. I wanted to show what I was capable of if I put my mind to it. There was a good gathering of people at Demi-Lune, and I remember being a bit put-off by the noise and activity at the crag. In fact, I think this encouraged me more to get psyched and really go for it - it was just like in competitions where there is noise and lots of distractions, but you have to zone-in to the climb and use the atmosphere to your advantage and feel the adrenaline! This was what I’d been doing for years and it had never fazed me - for some reason I’d had difficulty transferring it onto the rock. I think I had always doubted myself when it came to outdoors, believing that I was just a competition climber and would never be able to do hard routes outdoors. I had to deal with comments along this line from very narrow-minded adults (yes, adults!) a lot when I was younger, and if there’s one thing I enjoy doing, it’s proving people wrong and surprising those who doubt my abilities in some way.
I got on the route and made it to the rest before the crux. This was it, a massive move that required full committment. I looked at the pocket and went for it - powerscreaming and latching it. The next moves also required a lot of gutsiness -I did the same and roared as I caught the next holds. I was being aggressive and it was working! I made it to near the top before falling after getting my hand sequence wrong, I was annoyed at falling but satisfied with the way I had climbed. Everyone down below was quite taken-aback by my performance, as was I! I had always been a very cautious and considerate climber in competitions and in general, but this new style of climbing seemed to work well for me outdoors. The power-screaming seemed to remind me how much I wanted the route, and prevent any insecurity or reluctance from taking hold of me.
Getting angry on Carte Blanche 8a
Now more confident in my abilities, “Carte Blanche” and the next two 8a’s came quick and fast - I did the same on “Bourinator” and “Colonettes”, and climbed with sheer aggression and determination. “Colonettes” was probably the hardest route for me, moreso because I had had a nightmare on it on my first attempt! After failing on the boulder problem at the start, which has a very big move to a poor sidepull, I was slightly demotivated for trying the rest of the route - graded at 7c+ if you can’t free the start. I hadn’t climbed much on tufas before and found them quite intimidating, I didn’t like the massive runouts and found knee-barring a very alien concept, and after getting completely boxed on the tufas the top section was still quite tricky on sharp holds! This first attempt involved lots of negativity and “I can’t”s, but after doing “Carte Blanche” I was determined to get it done. I struggled to do the first section, but eventually summoned up the power to get through it and completed the route! In the space of one week I had ticked 3 8a’s in a row, a feat I never thought I could acheive when I was struggling to get to grips with 7a’s and run-outs!
It was time to work on something slightly harder - I had an attempt at “Dolce Vita” 8a+ and “Radote Jolie Pepere” 8b. Both routes felt tickable, but with the time I had left I wanted to focus on “Dolce Vita”. On my second attempt I reworked the crux, and by the third I came off halfway through the crux, but found a new foothold! It was getting late and my skin was sore. I was tired but wanted to do this route on my next go. I went for a run to warm up and got on, not feeling as comfortable as before but my determination won through - my sequence worked and I roared through the crux. Once again, mind had won over matter! Watching the footage of me climbing this route taken by Robbie really inspired me, I had never seen myself climb like that before from a distance, and looking on as a spectator gave me a different perspective on my climbing. I had surprised myself and my foot was now in the door for climbing a harder grade!
In all I realised what I am capable of if I put my mind to it - as someone once said to me, I reckon I climb about 3 grades harder in competition than I do in training - purely because of my determination to succeed and the way my mind has adapted to competitive environments. I have had to learn to be competitive with myself and the routes I try outdoors, and to believe in my abilities. I feel fitter and stronger than before I went out, and can’t wait to get back on a trip with friends and meet more new people I would like to thank everyone on the trip who gave support in some way - whether it was a quiet “Allez Nat!” or a full-on “PUSH IT OUT!” We had a great team spirit at the crag! Thanks also go to Robbie for his patience and support when I was finding my feet on the rock, and for looking after me over the last few days when I was vomiting and generally not being very pleasant to be around
Now that my fingers seem to have healed up, I am psyched to get into training for next year and all the trips I have coming up - Yorkshire, Kalymnos and Spain! My aims for the next year are to consolidate 8a/+ and climb some 8b’s, bring it on!